Ah yes, fumar.

It's a bit of a novelty just to be smoking indoors, but finding so many "smoke aquariums" is a great thing.

God bless the Atlanta airport, and all the backwards people of the South.



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On my way to the other side of the country.

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Boarding. Made it just in time.

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Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport

This airport is a ridiculous maze. I searched for my flight for half an hour before I found out I was in the wrong terminal. Let this serve as a word of advice: when choosing a series of flights to get you from point A to B, do not change airlines. If you're switching from US Airways to Delta, for example you may have to go outside, actually board a shuttle bus, and go to a completely separate terminal. It's like a whole different airport! And you'll have to go through security again. And if you believed the girl at the information desk, you'll probably ride the green and white shuttle all the way to terminal 2, when the only terminal serving Delta flights is obviously Terminal 3. No sir. Changing airlines is NOT recommended.



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Christmas in Southern California

There's a giant tree, decorated with all the trimmings. There's hoiday
nusic playing on the mal's outdoor PA. Somehow, with all the palm
trees and sun, it seems very little like Christmas.

Gage. Or Mowgli.

You just can't keep a shirt on that boy.

Victor's a wild man.

My brother's kids are a mess, tiny masses of concentrated energy,
exploding loud and fast all... day... long. I don't know how parents
do it. I couldn't dream of trying to keep up with these midgets.

-

Lunchie Munchies?!?! Hmmm?!?!?

We're on our way to lunch at the Turning Stone Casino. Sweet. Lunch
at the Turning Stone with the kids is my favorite. And roulette. I
love me some roulette.

-

-

Boredom and robbery, part two.

It's Sam Adams, which always makes me feel like home, so that makes it
almost worth the nine dollars.

Airports have this amazing freedom to trap you for as long as they
like (unlawful imprisonment), violate you (at best, harrassment), and
take your money (robbery). I'm sure it's all regulated by one federal
agency or another, so that makes me feel better.

I've got an unyielding trust for the federal government.

-

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The boredom and robbery of air travel.

Bob Hope Airport (though nobody calls it that, everyone just says
"Burbank Airport"), San Francisco, Chicago O'Hare, not single smoking
room in any of these airports. I suppose it pays to travel through
the South. Tobacco's big business down there, so I'm sure they've
still got those stinky little smoke-filled aquariums in every terminal
and concourse. Connect through Vegas, and you've probably got access
to a full blown opium den and brothel for your layover.

These are things I really need to think about when I book my flights.

So what I've got to do is, I've got to follow the signs that say
"ground transportation" all the way to the door out onto the street.
Smoke two cigarettes, strip all the metal and shoes from my body, and
head on back through security to get back to my gate, to wait another
ninety minutes until they start boarding the plane.

Shit, ninety minutes? What could I do with ninety minutes if I
weren't trapped in airport terminal? Let me think about my last day
off...

Okay, so apparently with ninety minutes, I could read the first half
of every article in the latest Rolling Stone, drink nine beers, smoke
fourteen Newports, and not answer my phone eight times.

So I guess it's nor really wasting time if I really wouldn't have
gotten anything done with it anyway.

If they had one of those brothels here, though... Then I could get
something done in ninety minutes. That is, of course, if you include
the eighty-six minute, post-coital nap.